It may be actually raining sideways here in Asheville this morning. The day is so very grey, it felt a bit surreal driving to my chiropractic appointment through the rivers running down the usual roadways. Of course, I left my rain jacket (with hood) in the back seat of my well-loved teen-aged Honda Accord over the weekend, and it is positively buried beneath all the stuff we’re donating to Salvation Army and the bin of odds + ends we had no where else to hide from potential home-buyers as they tour our immaculate house. So my only option other than donning a plastic garbage bag was my black “dressy” London Fog trench coat (without hood). I’ve decided you really can’t call a trench coat without a hood a proper rain jacket. It’s just a coat that repels water off your torso. That’s it. Essentially, it looks like I showered with my clothes on like an idiot. But that’s kind of an endearing look, right?!

Because it’s a dreary, wet, grey day on the back end of an incredibly intense week, I was craving some coffee shop time with my journal. The first place I went to is apparently closed on Mondays. Oh, joy. I wish I had known that prior to stepping out into the swirling waterfall pouring down from the sky. Back into the car I went, sopping wet, more determined than ever to hunt down the perfect cup of coffee in a cozy setting.

The ironic thing is, I stopped drinking coffee three years ago after going through Arbonne’s 28-day health + wellness detox. I don’t crave coffee anymore. I start my day with an Arbonne energy drink that gives me clarity without the caffeine shakiness. But my sweet angel-of-a-sister-in-law brought me coffee the other night as a pick-me-up while I was frantically preparing our home for an open house scheduled for the following day, and now I am craving caffeine in the form of delicious dark-roasted brewed beans.

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My husband, Jarred, is out of town for business, yet we both felt we should go ahead with our first open house. After all, time is of the essence when it comes to real estate endeavors! So I commenced with the task of preparing our home to look like normal people don’t actually live here (…errrrr, I mean, a home that anyone who doesn’t understand the concept of a “junk drawer” can move into). Don’t get me wrong: we are people who enjoy cleaning and organizing (yep, I just openly admitted that — but hey, it’s a great stress-reliever when unrelated to people walking through your home as potential buyers!), and we have already gone through implementing “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up” about three different times now (so perhaps I’m not really fully executing the KonMari Method?!), but still — life tends to pile up! So there was a lot to be done before our big first open house.

A couple of friends dropped in Saturday morning, bringing danish and two big black garbage bags of extra newspaper they picked up while hunting down their own packing supplies. They were a sweet help with the beginning steps of moving and staging, for which I was grateful. But after they left, it still looked like the closets and cabinets had exploded their contents into the house’s open spaces, and my heart was overwhelmed with all that had yet to be done. I was working hard, but not getting ahead. I couldn’t clearly decipher what we needed to keep or donate or sell or pack. It can be confusing to make those choices without your life partner by your side. All the “stuff” was running together. I started to panic pray — you know, when you are just saying over and over with increasing fervency, “God, help me. Oh, Lord, help me… Jesus, please freaking help me!!!!”

And then out of the blue, when I was at my breaking point, I received a lifeline from my sister-in-law, Meredith. The only problem? How to actually say “yes” to an offer of help.

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Meredith reached out in the midst of her own very full and busy life and asked if I needed help, and I realized in that moment, much to my dismay, that while I LOVE helping others (and apparently love to pray for help), I absolutely hate receiving help. (Hello, Pride… How very smugly you show up in various areas of my life…) She upped the ante by making it clear on the phone: I’m not coming to hang out. If I come, you need to put me to work…which was exactly what I needed. But how is an overwhelmed lady supposed to ask for or receive that kind of offer? It feels so weird and awkward to put people to work on all the stuff you feel you should have done on your own. All I can say is, desperate times call for…humility. So, I swallowed hard and accepted her incredibly kind, unbelievably gracious gift of assistance.  Let’s be real, people. I was drowning, and the woman threw me a ginormous life raft and offered to captain the ship safe to shore!

An hour later there she was, standing in the middle of the chaos and confusion of me trying to declutter and “depersonalize” our home, with coffee and donuts in hand and an understanding smile on her lovely face. She surveyed the situation, rolled up her sleeves and got to work, guiding me in a gentle, respectful way. She was like a blend of Mary Poppins, Joanna Gaines and Jesus — and waves of relief washed over me in the midst of the mounting stress. Meredith lead me through the Red Sea of Open House Trepidation + Pressure To Get It All Done Just Right — to the other side — a thoughtfully staged home that I would love to purchase! (Do we even want to buy another house now?!) (Just kidding, Jarred…)

Meredith invested her time, talent, strength, leadership and love into this journey Jarred and I are walking, and she did it like a BOSS. Sometimes in life, we need an outside force of nature to get us to the other side of an overwhelming situation. It’s not that we are necessarily failing at a task; it’s that we need a partner who is strongly gifted in the areas where we are weak to get us out of our own head and moving forward on a clear path. I was lost before Meredith came; and I was totally rescued by her kindness and the grace of God to hear my panic prayers. And, unbelievably, the house was ready on time for the showing! Hallelujah, praise Jesus!!! I don’t think I’ve worked so hard in all my life to declutter, pack, stage and deep clean like Spring and Fall cleaning are hitting at the same time…and a white glove inspection might happen just for good measure. Holy Moses, Batman! WHEW! This darling gem of a home better sell quick, because I don’t have the emotional fortitude to go through this showing process a dozen times…

So now I am sitting in the coziest West Asheville coffee shop, catching my breath and enjoying Izzy’s special 3 Bean Dream latte along with a perfectly toasted everything bagel covered in a thick layer of cream cheese. Can I just say, DELISH?! (Jesus, thank You for Izzy’s…) I am at rest here, warm and calm and slowly drying off from my sky shower, while a great mix of music plays and my belly fills with goodness. And it just hits me all at once — I am so, so grateful for the support of family and friends through the wild changes of life. Numerous people we love have gifted their time, resources, care, prayers, counsel and strength to us as we pursue this next chapter in our lives. And it fills our hearts with so much gratitude and love and excitement for what’s ahead. (Seriously — y’all know who you are. Thank you so, so much!!!)

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All of this gets me to thinking…

We were made for community. We need each other! I think this is what God desires the Church to be — a body made up of various parts and gifts all working beautifully together to accomplish both great miraculous feats and things that just come up as necessities in life. We were created for purpose and for one another; no one has ALL the gifts and talents needed for ALL the things life throws in our direction. Anytime we feel like we have to do this life thing on our own, it’s a set up. It’s healthy to ask for and receive help. It’s good to extend our strengths in service to others. We need to know we’re not alone in the mess — and that kindness and grace can see us in the midst of our chaos and not judge or condemn us. Love and assistance are available — to give and to receive — and hearts are knit just a bit tighter as we work together, side-by-side. Personally, I’m starting to get a glimpse of how pride separates and the way humility brings closeness, healing and deeper relationship. It’s an uncomfortable lesson to learn, yet the benefits are really wonderful to experience as I open myself up to being seen and known, just as I am.

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Today’s Life Lessons

Extend the favor of assistance as you are able, and ask for the help you need, being willing to humbly + joyfully receive the gifts others offer. In the storms of life, find cozy, safe places for your heart. Also, it never hurts to look at the weather forecast before burying your rain jacket and umbrella under all the things in the backseat of your car. Being prepared in life comes with its own benefits; however, the reality is, we’re not always prepared for what we encounter…so don’t be afraid to look like an almost-drowned cat (physically or emotionally) if that’s how you are in the moment. Those who love you will find your “hot mess-ness” endearing and will like you anyway. Do what you can with the time and resources you have; progress can outweigh “perfection”. Finally, drink the blessed coffee when you need it and get yourself a back-up umbrella. There are some things in life you just shouldn’t live without!

From Izzy’s Coffee House in West Asheville, NC with love,

– The woman clearly not wearing a proper rain jacket  xx